Dear rappers: Please. Stop. Acting.

Ten rappers who should never, ever, ever act again

Sure, some rappers have successfully crossed over from wireless mic to boom mic (just take a gander at the careers of Will Smith, Queen Latifah and Mos Def). But most rappers just torture the auspices of good taste across the world, one critical flop at a time.

In honor of Coolio’s new TV show, “Coolio’s Rules,” here are ten of our favorite tactical errors made by rappers-turned-actors.

Epic fail: movies that should never, ever be video games

Seriously, we mean it

Hollywood’s relationship with video games goes both ways.

Studios look to games, like “Max Payne,” as inspiration for new film franchises, while game companies collaborate with Hollywood on turning beloved properties like James Bond and Spider-Man into instantly recognizable, and sometimes even good, games. But for every movie that seems like a no-brainer for the console treatment, there are many more that should be avoided at all costs.

In an effort to beat greedy developers to the punch, we’ve compiled a list of ten movies that we never, ever, want to see turned in to games. —Drew Tewksbury, Special to Metromix 10.17.08

When Bob met Al…

De Niro + Pacino = ?

For most of movie history, legendary actors Robert De Niro and Al Pacino have been ships passing in the night. They were both in “The Godfather Part II,” but their characters lived their lives decades apart. When they finally shared the screen in “Heat” it was for a single scene. Now, with “Righteous Kill,” the two tough guys finally truly co-star in a story about cops and corruption.

Who knows what cinematic treasures we’ve missed out on because of these all too infrequent collaborations? Here’s our best guesses for what a few classic movies might have looked like if De Niro and Pacino had shared top billing. —Drew Tewksbury, Special to Metromix

Nicolas Cage’s bad hair days

Hair today…gone tomorrow

There it goes again. Nicolas Cage’s hairline.

Like the rise and fall of the ocean tide or the wax and wane of the moon, Cage’s hairline is a Hollywood indicator of the passage of time. Entire years can be gauged by it: 1987 was a sideburn phase, 1996 was the year of mangy mane and the release of “Bangkok Dangerous” signals 2008 as the beginning of hairplug era.

We invite you on a brief history of Cage’s increasingly horrifying hair-don’ts, assisted by the artistry of 19th century Japanese poetic form haiku. —Drew Tewksbury, Special to Metromix

Hey Hollywood, leave my childhood alone!

Who needs these sequels and remakes?

Hollywood is responsible for creating countless tender childhood movie memories, and then mercilessly crushing them with their iron fist. Remember that feeling of betrayal when Jar Jar Binks stumbled onto screen in the “Star Wars” prequel, or the shame of seeing Indiana Jones in old-man pants? Is nothing sacred anymore?

Apparently not. The financial allure of sequels and remakes frequently ruin treasured memories of perfectly good movies, all in the name of profit. This week’s straight-to-DVD release of “Lost Boys: The Tribe” and “WarGames: The Dead Code” represent just the latest example of Hollywood big wigs attempting to turn your nostalgia into their paychecks—quality be damned! Here are ten more reasons to be scared of Hollywood’s insatiable appetite for sequels and remakes. —Drew Tewksbury, Metromix

If they were siblings…

Sibling summer

Siblings can provide a steady helping of friendship and support, or a bottomless well of annoyance. Love ’em or hate ’em, they’re always gonna be there.

The new comedy “Step Brothers,” starring Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly and opening July 25, just might put sibling rivalry back on Hollywood’s radar. Bu who else should be paired up? To help studio executives always looking to jump on a trend, we’ve come up with our own wish list of performers we’d like to see bonded as siblings (like “Saturday Night Live” stars Amy Poehler and Kristen Wiig, pictured)—and what, precisely, we’d like to see them do. Let the bickering begin. —Drew Tewksbury, Special to Metromix

Harrison Ford’s leading ladies

By Drew Tewksbury, Special to Metromix

From a smokin’ hot robot to a Nazi scientist, an Amish widow to Anne Heche, Harrison Ford has romanced some pretty unique leading ladies.

As his latest outing as Indiana Jones reunites him with a former flame (“Raiders of the Lost Ark” co-star Karen Allen) and pits him against a cold-blooded She-Wolf (Cate Blanchett), we’re taking a look back at some of Ford’s other memorable on-screen partners and scoring each one on a chemistry scale of 1-10.

Top 10 movie robots

By Drew Tewksbury, Special to Metromix

Forget the long days, the lazy, extended vacations and even the delicious BBQs. What would summer be without a fanciful smattering of robot cinema?

Disney and Pixar deliver this summer’s main course, “WALL-E,” the story of a little robot with a big existential crisis.

The cinematic road to “WALL-E” has been paved by androids, automatons, cyborgs and fembots…but let’s not get into semantics. All robots are rad.

That’s what makes picking the 10 best celluloid bots such a tough task. But here are our choices—with all apologies to “Blade Runner’s” bio-engineered replicants (sorry, too human!).